There was a book called “The Secret” that proposed a law of attraction. In essence, it was something like: if you can visualize your dream vividly, it will eventually come true. As an engineer, I can find a lot of loop-holes in that statement.
What I want to discuss today is the REAL law of attraction. This one I can guarantee to you works 100% of the time. It is a law, like the law of gravity. It always works.
This is simple: “People with similar values are attracted to each other.”
The implications of this law are profound. It is today’s customer secret that I want to share with you.
Using the Law Of Attraction
We use the law of attraction in two ways during the selling/persuasion process. The first way is to type a prospects personality temperament. It is one of my five steps that I use to determine which personality temperament category a person belongs too.
Typing some people can be really easy. Others can be a lot harder. But the law of attraction gives us a big clue that can help us type those people that are harder to type.
The very core of personality is this statement that was divulged in Customer Secret #1 – People with similar personality temperament have similar values. They have beliefs for success that are largely aligned with each other.
With that in mind, the law of attraction says that people with similar values are attracted to each other.
Do you know where this is going?
If people with similar values have similar personality temperaments, and people with similar values are attracted to each other, it stands to reason that people with similar personality temperaments are attracted to each other.
Therefore, we can apply this law when typing those people that are more difficult to categorize, simply by looking at who they are attracted to. Who do they admire and hang out with?
Maybe one of those other people that they hang out with, is one of those people that are easy to type? If you can type one person in a close-knit group, there is a very high likelihood that the other person that is difficult to type has a similar personality temperament because they probably have similar values. If they didn’t have similar values, they wouldn’t be hanging out together.
I call this this step in my typing methodology: “look for contextual clues.”
Who they hang out with, and where they hang out is a clue that reveals their personality.
People won’t hang out for very long with those that hold opposite values that they hold.
There are so many examples of this:
- Married couples are often similar personality temperaments
- People with the same political affiliations often have similar personality temperaments
- People that have the same religious beliefs often have similar personality temperaments.
The law of attraction works. “Likes are attracted to each other.”
But there are always exceptions… Sometimes people with opposite polarity are attracted to each other. How do you explain that?
The way that I explain two people with opposite personality temperaments partnering together is that either it is situation where they felt that they didn’t have other options to find a more suitable partner, or they felt that they were missing something in their own life and wanted to find out what it would be like to have that.
In the end, relationships where people have different values are a bit more rocky. A lot of partnerships of people with different temperaments have a higher failure rate. All conflict occurs as a clash in values.
If you’d like to learn what your customer values and how to type their personality temperament, just subscribe to our mailing list. When you do, you\’ll get the free chart that links each of the four personality temperaments with their common values. This will allow you to start making sales faster in a way that is truly customer centric because you’re giving them exactly their own reasons for buying your products or services.
About the author:
Tim Van Milligan is an expert in using personality theory in persuasion and sales. He’s written several books including: “Selling By Personality Type: The Values Fears and Anger Triggers that Cause People to Buy”, “Emotional Copywriting Revealed,” and “Selling Yourself: Advanced Strategies for Landing Your Dream Job.” He makes his living as a rocket scientist and entrepreneur, and on the side teaches other sales people a step-by-step approach on how to change the way they persuade by really understanding customers with the principles of personality.